


there are so many lives i want to share with you

by milktea_s



Category: Naruto
Genre: 5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:14:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25045966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milktea_s/pseuds/milktea_s
Summary: He vows to make it back to their side, even if it takes him an eternity of lifetimes.
Relationships: Hyuuga Neji & Rock Lee & Tenten, Hyuuga Neji/Tenten
Comments: 9
Kudos: 45





	1. zero

**Author's Note:**

> happy birthday neji!! ♥ let's all pretend i didn't have this draft sitting in my wip folder for the past six months lol...  
> i'll be separating the scenes into individual chapters ~~& will be posting one a day~~ well that ended up being a lie :')  
> title is taken from "the next ten minutes" from the musical _the last five years_. hope you enjoy c:

The last thing he sees is Hinata-sama, frozen in shock as she stands behind Naruto. She, who had been so willing to give up her own life for the man she loved, whose place was taken by the cousin with whom she’d finally made peace after years of misplaced resentment.

The last thing he hears is Naruto, angrily demanding to know why he sacrificed himself the way he did.

The last thing he thinks is if Tenten will ever forgive him for his recklessness. That had always been Lee’s troubling habit, one that he and Tenten both tried to reign in to no avail. He’s supposed to be level-headed. Someone she can trust on the battlefield not to make impulsive choices and _die_. Yet, here he is, whispering his final goodbyes into the air, hoping the wind might carry his regrets and wishes to his friends—no, his _family_ —on another battlefront.

All the things he’s never been able to say to them. Thank you. Sorry. 

He vows to make it back to their side, even if it takes him an eternity of lifetimes.


	2. one

Their future prospects are not looking promising.

For the past two moons, they have been travelling south to rejoin the main branch in the southern court. The northern court is on the verge of collapse. Gai-shīfù and Lee had stayed to fend off the invaders, but Neji knows that there is little chance at success. It is clear that his family elders think the same, too; otherwise, they would not have sent for him.

Tenten at least has been tasked to escort him into the southern borders and remains faithfully by his side. It’s hard to say whether this is a good thing. Her presence is a comfort when they’ve been chased out of their palace. But that she is allowed to accompany him is evidence enough that the main branch sees her as a convenient weapon. She was raised in the royal family, but not as a female of nobility. She escaped the torture of foot binding, and in its place, she was taught to wield fists and blades. A glorified assassin, a dispensable bodyguard for the royal family.

But she’s also so much more than that. She’s as much his protector as she has become his greatest ally, confidant, and friend.

Their journey is slow progress, as they travel by night, taking care to find well-hidden shelter in the day. They travel with very little, only a few days’ worth of provisions and limited weaponry so as to move quickly and leave less of a trail for enemy scouts to track. When they run low on food, Tenten makes an undercover stop in town to replenish their supply, and they keep moving.

She is sharp and alert and, after so many nights of uneasy sleep, very on-edge. It is with much regret that Neji observes the lightness in her features has been replaced by a grim determination. Her smiles now are more derisive than they are cheerful.

The foliage rustles from several meters away, and Tenten instantly tenses, instinctively tightening her grip on the pair of dāo resting at her hip. He presses himself to the ground in an attempt to conceal his presence behind tall grass. From his vantage point, he can’t see the potential threat to their camp but waits for Tenten’s signal to spring to action. 

They hear the sound of more rustling, then voices in a foreign dialect. Though he isn’t able to pick out exactly what is being said, the tone of their conversation worries him. It sounds urgent and hostile, and he fears they’ve been discovered.

Tenten’s fingers twitch around her blade as she assesses the risk of taking out the approaching enemies. She decides against it, however. They haven’t yet been noticed, and attacking would only confirm their presence to their enemies.

After holding their breaths for what seems like an eternity, they hear the voices begin to fade into the distance. Tenten relaxes her grip on her dual knives and signals the all-clear. However, they both stay on the ground and take a moment to exhale in relief.

Then, Tenten breaks the silence. “Neji, we can’t stay here. They’ll find us if we do. We have to go.”

She is right, of course, but he can hear the exhaustion beginning to seep into her voice. They’re no stranger to combat situations, having been sparring partners since either of them could stand, but being on the run for weeks straight is no less tiring even with their years of training.

“If we move now, will we be spotted?” he asks.

Tenten looks for a moment into the distance, then admits, “They’re gone for now, but it’s hard to say if they’ll catch us while we’re travelling. It’s almost dawn, which doesn’t give us a lot of time. It’s best if we avoid travelling in broad daylight. Let’s hope they’ve decided to go in another direction.”

She sighs and continues, “Changing our attire can only go so far in concealing our identities. If anyone comes close enough to look, there’s no mistaking your family’s white eyes.”

He looks away bitterly. If only he hadn’t been born in this situation, they wouldn’t be hunted down like prey. “Sorry.” Suddenly, he’s so very weary of everything.

Tenten’s eyes flicker to his at his self-deprecating tone. “It is what it is. Trust me, it’s a bad spot to be in no matter who or what we are. The Jin’s attack affects everyone, whether it’s the nobility now on the run or the peasants who fear their village will be pillaged by approaching troops. We can only hope to reach the southern court on time and recoup. Once you’ve recovered, your family will have a much-needed strategist to rally a resistance and reclaim the imperial court.”

She sounds so hopeful. He hates that her faith in his tactical skill might be undeserved. “I’m not so sure.”

She places a hand on his shoulder then and shakes her head firmly. “You  _ are _ important, Neji, and you  _ will _ turn the tide of this war. It’s why the Jin want you dead. It’s why they’ve been trying to track us for so long. And it’s why I have to get you to the huángdì at all costs.” She squeezes lightly and lets her hand fall away. “Come on, we should get moving.”

He finds himself thinking that he wants to live up to her optimism. He’s already lost Gai-shifu and Lee, and he doesn’t want to lose her, too. The future she envisions sounds like a dream, and he wants so selfishly for it to be a reality. In that future, they succeed—and more importantly, she survives to stay by his side.

They pack their things and keep walking. They don’t stop until the first rays of sunlight threaten to break the veil of darkness. Tenten’s eyes still shift restlessly as she surveys their surroundings. “Looks like this is as far as we can go tonight.”

Her sigh tells him more than she’s willing to say: that she still doesn’t feel safe, but they don’t have other options. They quickly set up camp, and she volunteers to take first watch. Though he has on separate occasions offered to switch with her, she is insistent that he rest. She only lets him keep vigil in the four hours she lets herself sleep, just before twilight. 

Before she takes her perch, she says, “We’re almost to the border. I think if we keep pace we can make it to Naruto jiāngjūn in four days’ time. He’ll be able to escort us to the court, and we’ll finally be safe.”

He nods and closes his eyes dreaming of refuge and dreading disaster.

He wakes at the sharp whisper of “Neji” and a hand roughly shaking him awake. It’s Tenten. She has moved from her spot, and he’s instantly on alert. His vision clears, and he registers the reason for the urgency in her voice. It’s a storm of dust in the distance and a faint pounding against the earth that can only mean soldiers on horseback.

The cavalry is still far away, but it will soon gain on them. She unties her hair and demands, “Give me your headband.”

He does, and she ties it around her forehead. Then, Tenten shoves her unpacked bedroll and a small device into his hands.

“Go!” she says fiercely. “Cut through the mountain pass. Follow the needle. Get as far away from here as you can. Don’t stop until you reach Nanjing.”

She sees the question in his eyes and adds, “I’ll lure them away, then I’ll meet you in Suzhou. Just go.”

It’s a lie. If she succeeds in drawing the cavalry towards her, there is no way she’ll be able to outrun mounted troops. But she gives him another forceful push to spur him into action, and he lets himself believe her lie. In his mind, he can already see how all the odds are stacked against them and all the brutal ways her efforts come to an end. But he doesn’t want that to be the end. He doesn’t want to think about how they fail.

The future she spoke of, it is now with desperation that he wishes for it to come true. He runs.

He doesn’t make it past Nanjing. The troops anticipated he would pass through the city on his way south and greet him at the city gates. It’s too late to turn and run in the other direction, and he’s far too tired to resist any longer. He recognizes his headband tied to the banner and realizes that they’ve captured Tenten.

The Jin were not merciful enough to keep her alive. She would have been immediately executed.

He regrets leaving Tenten behind and failing to make the future she dreamed of a reality. The southern court will hold, but it’s unlikely now that they’ll be able to reclaim the northern territory conquered by the Jin.

If this is where it ends, Neji hopes to be reborn as something that might be able to find them again.


	3. two

Tenten doesn’t know whether to laugh or to cry. Every other attempt has ended in rejection; she’s been turned away at every door and ridiculed for attempting to pursue a profession meant for men. The townsfolk don’t take kindly to a girl trying to find her own space in a man’s world. All day, she’s heard taunts that the people of Florence are crazy and that Tsunade is a hack, but Tenten clings stubbornly to her resolve.

She aspires to be just like her idol, Tsunade of Florence, a renowned artist all throughout the land who has managed to win over the hearts of her audience through her sheer talent alone. Tsunade isn’t someone who lets others’ condescension due to her gender affect her; even in a sphere of predominantly men, she stands atop it wielding respect and influence.

The only artist in town who is willing to give her a chance just has to be the most eccentric mentor possible. But beggars can’t be choosers, and this is honestly more than she could have hoped for.  _ This _ is going to be her ticket out of poverty. 

Studying under the tutelage of the outlandish but respected artist Guy Might is just the first step. 

Her first day at the studio is… an experience. She’s introduced to Master Guy’s two other apprentices, Lee and Neji. She supposes she should count herself lucky that Lee is friendly. He doesn’t bat an eye when Master Guy introduces her as a new pupil, surprisingly. He’s actually quite accommodating—excited, even, that there’ll be a female student in their midst. Neji, on the other hand, doesn’t look too thrilled, but he doesn’t voice any dissent for having to share his workspace with a female. After everything she’s withstood to be in that room, it’s almost comparable to acceptance. Tenten considers it a win.

Still, she mostly stays within the studio, where her apprenticeship as an artist-in-training is accepted. When she and Lee and Neji are sent out for errands to purchase materials for the studio, she doesn’t miss the pointed glares and vicious gossip about her. Master Guy is an influential enough figure in Naples that no one in town would outwardly denounce his decision, but it does nothing to stop the rumors from circulating.

She tries to ignore what they say because they aren’t the people that matter. So long as Master Guy approves, then she must belong in the artist world after all. But she can’t help her fists from clenching and her lips from trembling and her posture from stiffening in frustration. Lee picks up on her unhappiness with a frown and stays resolutely by her side despite all the disapproving stares. Neji doesn’t so much as acknowledge the nasty things they say about her, which she supposes is him showing support in that quiet, ambiguous way of his.

Months pass, then a year, and then two more, but the public sentiment does not get any better. Rumors continue to fly, but as they escalate, her peers (her family now, really) become more vocal about their indignation at the injury of their friend. She’s touched by their acceptance above all, and for a while, the things the townsfolk say about her weigh a little less on her mind.

But then the western block catches on fire, and the studio burns to the ground. Master Guy is devastated because why would he not be? It’s his livelihood. But then he gives each of his pupils a tearful hug and says he considers himself fortunate that his students are alive and well. His studio can be rebuilt, his works can be redone—but their lives once lost cannot be reclaimed, he says.

Tenten knows, when all the other buildings on the block emerge still standing, that she is the target of the arson. Master Guy doesn’t blame her, and perhaps that’s what makes it all worse.

For all of their sakes, she makes the decision to leave. She’ll leave Naples, where the people she’s grown to love so dearly won’t suffer from her foolish mistake of being born with the wrong set of genitals.

She packs all her things (there’s very little she needs to bring) and scrapes together just enough for a ship fare to Florence. Maybe there she can seek out Tsunade. Maybe there is a future for her where she isn’t judged first by her appearance and her feminine features.

She sneaks away at first light before any of them wakes (before any of them can convince her not to go). She leaves them a short note and hopes they won’t resent her for going without telling them first. As she boards the ship, she’s left with a feeling of loneliness. After spending years at their side, she doesn’t know how she’ll face life without them. But she’ll have to, and she will. This is for the better. At least, that’s what she tells herself.

Still, her eyes water at the goodbyes she never got to say.

Unfortunately, Tenten never reaches Florence. Their ship is caught in a storm at sea, and the entire crew is engulfed by dark, cold waters. 

As she sinks down and down, she admits: she didn’t leave entirely without regrets. Master Guy, Lee, and Neji have all come to mean so much to her. If there truly is a higher being governing the heavens, she prays with all her might that this isn’t the end for them.


	4. three

The new hired help moved in about a week ago. Since then, Neji has only seen the stablehand once, when he went down to the stables for his weekly ride. Guy was odd, to say the least. Respectful, but with an eccentric behavior that has Neji wondering how his family elders had been persuaded to employ someone like him. Neji is told that Guy brought his two children, a son and a daughter, to stay at the house with him.

On his second visit to the stables, he meets Lee, who is every bit as strange and energetic as his father. He hears about a “Tenten” but has yet to meet her in person. The mental image of a female version of Guy and Lee is rather unpleasant, and with a frown he erases the idea from his mind. He doesn’t think he’s ready for someone like that. Plus, what kind of name is “Tenten,” anyway?

Tenten turns out to be different from what he’d feared. He finds a stranger peering discreetly through the window where Lady Hinata is studying literature with the live-in governess and is about to deliver some sharp words of warning when the girl whirls around. She bobs her head and introduces herself as Tenten, then excuses herself before he can reprimand her for spying on his cousin’s lessons.

His next encounter with her is on this fourth trip to the stables. He overhears a female voice admonishing Lee, and he’s instantly reminded of the girl who said only a handful of words in a surprisingly soft voice before running off. He rounds the corner to see the same girl with her arms at her hips and her face set in a frown as she tells Lee off for something he doesn’t care enough to find out. She presents an image so different from the females his age that he’s interacted with, it’s disconcerting.

She’s plucky and outspoken and nothing like the dainty, delicate ladies his cousins are taught that all proper women should strive to be. He doesn’t know what to make of her. All he knows is that she goes against every rule he’s been taught.

Then, she sees his lips pursed in displeasure and she quiets, and he thinks maybe she isn’t so different after all. He doesn’t know what’s worse, that she violates every single expectation he might have of her or that she bends disappointingly easily to fit in when others are present.

In the next three months, he learns that she’s full of contradictions. She produces stitches precise enough to rival Hinata’s fine needlework, though she uses her steady hand primarily to mend the wear and tear of clothing. It’s almost a shame. It’s really none of his business that she scribbles little notes into a book in oddly-formed letters that look nothing like the needlework he’s seen her capable of. She’s steady on her feet and is fairly adept at horseback riding, which earns her his grudging respect. He resigns himself to the thought that he might never fully understand her.

It takes several years of their acquaintance (most of which are spent pointedly avoiding each other), but they eventually converge on a topic of interest: mathematics. They grow closer through discussions of angles and probabilities and whether their futures are determined by the stars. She becomes someone whose opinion he trusts above many others because she never holds back. He appreciates that she always gives her thoughts, straightforward and honest, without mincing her words.

She’s there when he and Lee get into a riding accident, and she stays up all night by their side waiting anxiously for their recovery. When his cousins debut in society and they’re forced to attend countless parties, she waits out back for him because she knows he can only take so much of the simpering before he needs to escape from the ballroom’s suffocating atmosphere.

Outside of the social events where his cousins are concerned, he’s left mostly to his own devices. Even though Neji is in fact the Hyuuga successor, since his uncle has no sons, Hiashi has yet to give up on passing the Byakugan House to a son rather than a nephew. Their relationship is a front to keep up all appearances of a harmonious family, and Neji is all too aware of his precarious position. 

Instead of being treated as the heir apparent, he is largely ignored by his relatives other than his parents. Should his cousins welcome a younger brother to their midst, he would be relegated to the fate of every second son, left with an association to his family name but reaping none of its benefits.

When his father passes and he needs someone to just stay by his side, Tenten offers silent support. 

His father’s passing triggers something in his mother. He understands she is grieving the loss of her husband, and she worries for their future without the protection of Hiashi. There’s a sense of urgency now in her reminders to him of what is at stake. There’s suddenly a lot of pressing matters that must be attended to at his mother’s behest. What used to be days he spent alternating between his personal studies and time at the stables with Lee and Tenten becomes staying at his mother’s side and travelling outside the manor to fulfill her requests. It also means he sees much less of his friends.

It isn’t until far too late that the news reaches him that Gai has fallen ill. He returns from London to be informed weeks after the fact from a crestfallen Lee that Tenten had left. She’s practical enough to accept the first offer of a secure marriage from a baron who’d taken a fancy to her. She bargains on the financial support to give her father figure the medical attention he needs. Lee does his part by joining the militia in hopes of finding his own future.

He thinks of how her decision must have killed a part of her inside. He’s always known Tenten to be a romantic who dreamed big but left her wishes as just that: dreams to part with at waking. Her blazing eyes and burning determination that set her apart from the very start—it was as if life itself had dampened her spirits throughout the years. Reality had bombarded her relentlessly with reminders that hope was for fools. He never thought she’d fall prey to it.

Happiness in marriage isn’t something she has the luxury to consider, he’s sure she would tell him if he could ask her why she chose it.

It isn’t until she’s truly gone that he realizes just how much he’s relied on her and how… maybe he could have made her happy.

But there’s nothing he can do now that she’s already gone without so much as a word to him.

He learns that the baron she’s married resides in York. She won’t be making regular visits in the area.

A year later, he receives a letter from her in her handwriting that has much improved since the first time he recalls seeing her note-taking, apologizing for her sudden departure and wishing him warm regards. He reads with happiness and some amount of bitterness that she’s doing well, and she has a son now.

Their correspondence becomes more regular after that; he doesn’t know whether her husband condones the letters she writes to him, but she assures him that her husband would never resent her for reaching out to her dearest friend. She sends him news of her life in York and how her child is growing, and he responds with felicitations and the occasional updates from Lee.

It is perhaps a selfish request, but when Lady Hinata is to be wed, he asks for a favor from his cousin. Hinata looks at him with sympathetic eyes and sends a missive with a flourishing script to invite them to the reception.

The last time he sees her, she and her husband stand in the back of the cathedral, quieting their two children. She’s pregnant again. Her husband looks bored, but at least it appears that he treats Tenten well. For her part, she looks content. She smiles with tears in her eyes as the priest declares Naruto and Hinata husband and wife.

He speaks to her briefly after the ceremony, though she and her husband take an early leave, claiming his business trip the next day as their reason for being called away so quickly. Her voice is exactly as he remembers it, steady and calming, but now with an added maturity to it that is doubtlessly the result of her past few years of marriage, pregnancy, and motherhood.

He congratulates her, and she gives him a warm look. “I hope you can find happiness, too, Neji.” And she promises to write before she leaves with her family.

He receives a final letter in autumn, accompanied by a short note in handwriting he does not recognize. It is penned by her husband, explaining that Tenten had passed away due to complications in childbirth. Neji is grateful that the baron even bothered to deliver her letter and takes it as a small consolation that Tenten’s marriage was apparently one of mutual respect. That’s the most he could ever wish for her.


	5. four

The streets are filled with people, which means tomorrow morning will be a busy one. Sweeping the streets is a thankless job, especially when the other kids jeer at her for her station and adults walk past her as if she were invisible. But it keeps her stomach from going empty, so she doesn’t have room to complain.

The sun is deceptively bright for an otherwise chilly day, but it’s the norm for mid-morning in Petrograd. If anything, Tenten should count her blessings that the sky isn’t overcast to boot. Being able to see colors other than the dull blue and greys of the sea and sky has her in high spirits. It must be a good omen for a day of celebration.

Today marks the first public appearance of the next heir to the Hyuuga line. Rumor on the streets has it that he hasn’t made an appearance until now because his uncle, the czar, held on to a hope that his wife might birth him a son. But with the birth of a second daughter, the higher courts were restless in vying for the czar’s favor.

The czar silenced all questions about who might succeed him by naming his nephew the heir.

The lives of the nobility are of little concern to Tenten beyond their patronage, but the parade is still a promise of novel excitement that not even the weary and poor can resist. For weeks, Tenten has heard curious whisperings about the young prince, from wild conspiracy theories surrounding his ascension to concerns about the czarina’s health.

Trumpets sound in the streets, and the clattering of hooves along cobble turns low murmurs into raucous cheering. She climbs atop a platform to peer at the arriving entourage. It’s an elaborate procession of the royal family flanked by palace guards. The czar Hiashi and his czarina stand in front, leading prince Neji and the young princess Hinata by the hand, followed by the rest of the Hyuuga family.

There’s a natural poise in the way he carries himself that’s unmistakable even from a distance. She isn’t close enough to make out his expression, but there’s an air of stiffness about him that makes her give pause.

Curious, she decides to go in for a closer look. She’s small and nimble enough that squeezing through the crowd is an easy task. However, she fails to account for the momentum that propels her forward, sending her stumbling almost too close to the guards.

She rights herself and shrinks in horror as the stern eyes of the czar pass over her and hastily backs away. But then she sees that she’s drawn the attention of the prince as well. He stares at her inquisitively with the piercing white eyes of his family’s bloodline, neither judging nor friendly. Simply observing.

She doesn’t know what compels her to do it, but she sinks into a bow. It’s a little awkward and wobbly, but it’s the best she can muster.

When she looks back up, his eyes are alight with a glimmer of mirth. She realizes then that his eyes aren’t white, but a soft shade of lavender-grey. It makes his handsome aristocratic features even more breath-taking with the way it softens the sharpness in his face. He’s far more beautiful than she expects him to look. Tenten could have mistaken him for a girl instead of the crown prince if she’d seen his long hair tied into a low ponytail on any other person.

Slowly, his lips curve into a small, secretive smile. As if it were for her and her only, even though they’re standing in a crowd of thousands of spectators. It’s this that leaves the strongest impression on Tenten. One that fills her with an inexplicable warmth as she continues sweeping the freezing streets at dawn.

It’s the last time she sees him. Two years later, one very compelling speaker leads the peasants to the streets and stokes the flame of revolution. The palace is overrun and burned to the ground. The entire royal family is executed.

The Hyuuga were indeed careless and ultimately deserved no compassion from the citizens they neglected, but until the warmth of her memory can carry her no longer, Tenten remembers that June day with a certain fondness. She wonders, perhaps, if the prince would have been any different from his uncle?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this is "crowd of thousands" from anastasia haha


	6. five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> t/w: (non-explicit) mention of rape

The war leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. He’s mostly removed from the battlefront, having been recently stationed in the north for defensive reasons rather than offensive. The unrest, however, is clear to see in both the civilians of the town he’s been assigned and his fellow soldiers. There are some among them who are itching for war and ready for a fight. Still others turn to comfort women while the general turns a blind eye. It makes him sick to the stomach.

He struggles with this seemingly inherent repulsion; logically, it makes no sense. He is an upstanding Japanese citizen carrying out his duty as the Emperor wills it. But it’s as if his very own body rejects the idea of war, some instinctive aversion to the cruelty and destruction he sees all around him that makes his blood run cold. His chest aches painfully in a way he doesn’t know how to describe.

He could be killed for such traitorous thoughts.

In the moments when it feels too much to bear, he travels to the outskirts of town and wanders aimlessly about. In the back of his mind, he registers that it is wartime, and to be caught out by himself would mean certain death. Sometimes he thinks he’d be okay with that. At least then he would be free from the internal conflict plaguing his mind and he would not die a traitor to his country.

It is on one such excursion that he meets her. She’s alone, and what astonishes him is that not once does she appear scared of him. She looks young, like she can’t be past her early twenties.

“Are you okay?” she asks him, and it’s laughable.

She must be foolish and naive; what young woman wouldn’t be terrified of the presence of a Japanese soldier? His peers have done horrible, unmentionable things that are brushed aside as a mere consequence of war.

But the eyes that stare back at him seem to shine with intelligence and compassion.

When he says nothing, she tries again. “You look troubled. Are you not tired? Why don’t you come over, and I’ll make you something to fill your stomach?”

It’s unsettling. How is it that this woman shows no fear? He doesn’t know what compels him to agree to her offer. 

Over a warm bowl of stew, he learns that she lives by herself. Her parents passed early, and she was raised by kind villagers. She learned the trade of the blacksmith and returned the villagers’ generosity by forging and mending their equipment. When news spread of foreign war arriving on the island, she retreated to the edge of the forest and set aside her tools. She promised her late mentor she would not create for the purpose of bloodshed, and she would not dishonor his memory. There’s something more to the story that she doesn’t tell, but she doesn’t need to, and he doesn’t press for more.

Neji wonders if it’s possible to hide from the war when it is on their doorstep. But who is he to criticize when he’s trying to do the same thing?

Regardless, she’s refreshing company. They talk of things that have been left behind or forgotten in the wake of war. It’s been so long since he’s been able to think of anything other than the looming threat of death. Is it cowardice for him to crave the remembrance of happier, simpler times?

If she senses that there’s some part of him that rebels against the idea of fighting in this war, she doesn’t let on. She doesn’t pry.

He returns to visit her often. Her place becomes a refuge of sorts. And when he makes his way back after being called away, she doesn’t question where he’s been or what he’s done. They both carry the inescapable burden of war and enough regret to last more than a lifetime.

She boils him tea, and he helps her with odd errands around the house. 

Occasionally, they’re joined by Lee, a friend of Tenten’s who travels between villages to deliver messages. The first time they meet, Lee is guarded. He quickly warms up to the Japanese soldier, however; Neji suspects it has more to do with Lee’s friendly nature than anything that could be contributed to his own doing. They form a strange group, but he feels at ease with them in a way he doesn’t know exactly how to place.

And so the years pass. A love blossoms between them from the mutual understanding that there are things too unbearable to address. It’s not a passionate love so much as a bond deeply rooted in their acceptance of each other, broken parts and all, without judgment.

When news reaches the town of the Americans developing a nuclear weapon, he learns of the tragedy back home and mourns his family. There’s no way of knowing whether they survived. He takes comfort in her presence, she who reminds him that there is light to be found behind every shadow.

Then the war ends so abruptly. The Japanese troops are to be withdrawn from the island as a consequence of being on the losing side of the battle. He thinks about staying, of going against his duty because all it’s caused him is more grief. But she gently reminds him that his home, his family need him.

He doesn’t say it, but he thinks, _you’re my home and family, too_.

He goes back to Japan. Lee is still away in another village and doesn’t know that he’s leaving. Perhaps it’s for the better because if Lee discovers what he is about to do, he would no doubt get an earful. His resolve is already fragile as it is, with the possibility of staying behind with them too easy to accomplish, and he knows he could very well abandon his birthplace at Lee’s fierce insistence. 

As he boards the ship that will take him across the seas and away from her, he searches for her in the crowd. He can’t make out her signature buns and wonders if perhaps the parting is too painful after all. He can’t fault her for that.

But just as the ship pulls away from the shore, he spots her. She’s running and waving madly heedless of the odd stares aimed her way, her hair free and billowing in the wind. He can’t help but think in that moment that she’s the most beautiful creature he’s ever seen. Her face is set in a brave smile, but it’s her eyes that give her away. 

When she’s no more than a speck along the shore, he turns away from his post. As he touches a hand to his cheek, his fingertips come away with a wetness.

He writes her letters, none of which she returns. He’s left wondering about her, whether she’s safe or happy. He hopes so. At least she will have Lee by her side—sincere and strong-willed Lee who is just as much as her family as she has become his. He hopes she’s moved on and left her memories of the war behind. That’s not something he can ever outlive, and he suspects neither can she. That doesn’t stop him from hoping.

Eventually, he marries a young woman approved by his family elders. He passes at a venerable age, leaving behind a grieving wife and two children in whom he takes immense pride. At the end of his years, he’s content, even learning how to smile again.

Yet, until the very end, there is a part of him that only she can fill. It is many more decades after the war before his nightmares subside, but he always remembers the woman whose presence alone banished his loneliness and flooded his world with light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this scene was inspired by cape no. 7


	7. plus one

When Tenten receives a politely-worded email from a Neji Hyuuga introducing himself as the TA for the introductory business law course she chose to fulfill her elective requirement, she pauses over the name. It sounds vaguely familiar, but she doesn’t recall ever meeting a grad student by that name. She shrugs, thinking perhaps she’s just encountered the name before elsewhere and thinks nothing more of it.

At the beginning of her first lecture, he stands up and briefly introduces himself in a smooth baritone that makes her think _wow_. She definitely hasn’t met him before because there’s no way she would forget a voice like that. Not to mention his uniquely colored eyes—a startling white that upon closer inspection is actually a gentle shade of grey, almost lavender.

Yet, a sense of familiarity still nudges at her subconscious.

His eyes scan the room and pause. It feels like he’s staring right at her, and she looks down at the notebook opened in front of her, away from his scrutinizing gaze. Mentally, she admonishes herself for being silly. She’s done nothing to be ashamed of, so why hide? Brazenly, she lifts her eyes back towards the front of the lecture hall. He’s still looking at her as he finishes with his tentative office hours.

She doesn’t know why when he stops talking and his eyes flicker away from her, she feels a twinge of disappointment. She decides it must be because it’s been a while since she’s seen a face as pretty as his, and who could blame a girl for being attracted to someone like him? She wasn’t above admitting that her business law TA had undeniably attractive features and was well-dressed to boot. 

But her primary concern has been and always will be maintaining her GPA so she can graduate summa cum laude, and she has no time to dwell on a pair of beautiful lavender-grey eyes. When she jots down his office hours to add to her calendar later, it’s entirely for the sake of her studies.

It turns out that even without the added fact that her TA is objectively gorgeous (if the hushed whispers she overhears from a number of her peers, both male and female, are anything to go by), business law is a challenging class. She finds herself frequently attending his office hours to listen for his advice. He’s well-spoken and concise, and his sessions are always extremely informative.

She notices that Neji isn’t a very social person. He’s responsive in his interactions with students but only speaks when spoken to. It’s a bit of a whimsical thought, but she wonders how he acts with his friends.

She gets her answer when she spots him on campus one day with a girl whose appearance is just as striking as his. They make quite a duo, Tenten muses.

His posture is as impeccable as always, but there’s a more casual air about him that looks somehow different from how he composes himself in office hours. It suits him, if she’s being honest.

She doesn’t mean to eavesdrop, but his voice carries to her ear as she walks by on her way to her next lecture. She hears him call his companion “Hinata,” and that’s when she realizes. The girl must be the same one Lee’s friend was talking very excitedly about some time ago. She hadn’t paid much thought to it then because Naruto tends to ramble at the pace of a rattling machine gun, and she didn’t know who this Hinata girl was. Seeing the girl now, Tenten thinks, yeah, she can understand why Naruto sounded enamored.

The quarter continues on, and her weeks fly by as midterms bleed into final exams. Business law is interesting, but it certainly makes her work for her grade. Some part of her curses her past self for deciding to take this class when she could easily have chosen a much easier class to fill the elective requirement. Instead of dying on a weekly basis, she could be coasting by.

But she doesn’t regret it. The professor’s lectures are engaging, she’s learning things outside of what her major-related courses would typically cover, and it’s an altogether unforgettable experience. Even if it does come at the price of precious sleep. She studies her ass off, and it’s a combination of a lot of caffeine and furious note-taking and frequent visits to available office hours that gets her through.

She turns in her completed exam sheet to Neji, and with her last final done, her quarter has come to an end. She doesn’t think he remembers her (or that she’s left much of an impression on him, given his strictly professional interactions with the entirety of the class, despite the copious hours she’s spent in his office), but when he takes her exam, he gives her a small smile.

“Thanks for being such an attentive student. It was nice having you in my class,” he says and offers his hand.

Her eyes widen just a fraction in surprise, but she quickly gives him a firm handshake. “Thank you,” she responds with a grin.

Tenten walks out of the class feeling on top of the world. When Lee’s finished with his exams, they go out to celebrate the end of their finals with ice cream.

She passes with a ninety-six, and she’s damn proud of it.

She doesn’t think she’ll see much of him again, but strangely enough, she bumps into him in the university town center several weeks later, after they’ve returned from spring break.

_Well, there’s nothing to lose_ , she thinks. The worst that could happen is they have an awkward exchange, and she never talks to him again. As for the best? Who’s to say?

She gives him a friendly wave. “Hey! Neji, how was your break?”

“Tenten,” he says amiably in greeting. “It was a well-needed rest. I hope yours was pleasant?”

She nods.

“Are you grabbing coffee as well?” he asks, glancing at the door only a few feet from where they stand. “Shall we go in?”

“Yeah,” she agrees and takes the lead.

He swiftly cuts in front of her to open the door for her, and she can’t help but smile.

“Thank you,” she says as she steps inside.

After they’ve picked up their coffee, they head back to campus together. As they walk, she asks, “Are you TA-ing another class this quarter?”

He shakes his head. “No, not this quarter, I’m afraid. I’ll be focusing on my thesis.”

“Ah. Good luck on your thesis, then.”

“Thank you.”

“Well,” she looks up at the engineering building. “This is my stop. Thanks for walking with me. It was nice to see you around, Neji!” She meets his eyes, wondering if he’ll accept if she asks him out for coffee again.

She doesn’t get to decide because he speaks up. “It was. If you wouldn’t mind, would you like to go for coffee again sometime?”

She can’t believe her ears. Did Neji Hyuuga just ask her on a casual date? Well, she certainly wouldn’t refuse him. “I’d love that,” she responds, her grin spreading from ear to ear. Hastily, she digs out a strip of paper and scribbles her number. “Text me whenever. I’m sure you know by now that I live on caffeine.”

“Soon, then,” he promises, taking the paper and tucking it into his breast pocket, right next to his heart. “I’m sure I’ll be needing plenty of caffeine to power through my thesis.”

She laughs. “I’m always down for coffee, so we can go as often as you need. Just shoot me a message.”

Something in her bursts with an unbidden sentiment of _I’ve caught up with you at last_. She doesn’t know where the feeling comes from, but she smiles as warmth burgeons in her chest.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! comments would be super appreciated 😔


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